Snow Tubing!

One thousand layers of clothes.

Leggings, jeggings, stretchy pants, Walmart wind pants, two shirts, a northface, a winter jacket, and faux Uggs. Those were the layers I wore this weekend on our snow tubing trip, in that exact order. Also underwear. And I'm glad I did, because otherwise I would have wound up with a butt full of snow like my sister.

I haven't laughed that hard in YEARS. Watching people slide down the hill and bite it half way down was the highlight of my life.

Here's how it works. First, you get on the tow rope. And by tow rope, I mean giant cable that revolves around with hooks on it that a guy with a neck tattoo hooks you up to. The loop runs around the gear at the bottom of the hill and YANKS you up backwards so you're facing down the mountain on your way up, watching your friends fall on their asses trying to get their own tubes on the tow rope.

So you get up to the top of the hill, and there's a sign that says: UNLOAD HERE. Was I paying attention, while riding up the mountain backwards, enjoying the view? Of course not. So I missed the sign with clear instructions, and promptly hear "MAAM! MAAM! UNLOAD!" In a panic, I spun around in my tube and realized I had passed the sign. Bundled arms and legs flailing, I managed to roll my seven layers of pants out of the tube and plopped face first into the snow. The worker guy kindly retrieved my tube, and I trudged the rest of the way up to the top of the hill to prepare for the descent.

So you snuggle your butt into the hole in the middle of the tube, hand the top worker guy the rope attached to your tube and hold on for dear life as he takes a running start and shoves you down the hill violently. 

I screamed the entire way down.

THEN, we discovered you can link your tubes together and go in a group. Big mistake. Huge. You FLY down the hill, white-knuckle grasping the rope of the people attached to you as tightly as you can, trying not to break free from the pack. The snow flies up in your face so fast that if you try to laugh, you get a mouth full of snow. When we finally skidded to a stop at the bottom, I rolled my layered ass out of that tube and laughed so hard I thought I might throw up.

Four hours (and several pitchers of beer from the lodge) later, we were on our way home with wet socks and an arsenal of hilarious stories.

The awesome tubing hill is to the left.

It was one of the most hilarious and entertaining experiences of my life. And if you've never been, you should TOTALLY do it. Relive your younger days and take the plunge. You'll laugh yourself into a snow coma.