Bachelor Pad 2: Slutty Girl Scout Camp

Jake and Vienna's epic public breakup.

Bachelor Pad 2 is chock full of crazy skanks with a few hotties thrown in. Jake and Vienna are douchebags, Kasey is whipped, and I've been praying for poor Ames to finally lose his v-card.

If you've never seen the show, think Paradise Hotel with discarded contestants of the Bachelor/Bachelorette and a touch of girl scout camp. Really slutty girl scout camp.

On last night's episode, the most romantic intimation rose out of the backstabbing, conniving ashes of the show. In a touching show of affection (and blatant disregard for the cash prize that he obviously didn't need) once his lady friend was voted off, Ames galloped toward the departing limo in slow motion and waved goodbye, too. I admit it--I teared up a bit.

See ladies? Chivalry isn't dead. If you're a reality TV star with plenty of money and a knack for grand gestures.

But now that my favorite couple is gone, I am hanging my hat on the drama queens that remain. Dance, puppets, dance.