Shuffling Boxes

Quitting your job is like a bad breakup. The time between giving your notice and completing your moral obligation of the final weeks is like being separated but still living under the same roof.

You can feel the tension, your mind is elsewhere (on the new job, most likely), and even through the emails you can sense the disconnect between you and the company you're leaving behind.

Thank god I work from home, or this would be like running into each other in the kitchen after filing for divorce.

"Oh... heyyy."
"Hey."
"How are things?"
"Good."
"Great. Well I just wanted to make a tuna sandwich, but I'll leave you alone in here to slice the tension with the knife set you demanded in the settlement."

I can do this. I can do this. Just a few more weeks of sleeping on the futon and silently shuffling boxes out to my car.

I quit my job!

Well kiddies, if you couldn't see through my transparent metaphor of a post, I have officially quit my job! (and gotten a new one.)

I don't normally talk about my job on here for obvious reasons stemming from self-preservation, but this is an exciting transition.

I currently work from home full time, as most of you know, and as awesome as that seems, I tend to go a bit stir crazy most days. Plus, K travels for work quite a bit, which leaves me alone to talk to my cats. And my plants. And yell at Maury for dragging out the DNA results.

So I will be a grown up now, with a grown up job in a real office, working for an AWESOME company. I am super excited!

Also, lots of other exciting things happened this weekend while we were in the mitten: my sister picked a wedding venue/date, I saw a lady get hit by a car, and had some car troubles on the 12-hour drive. This is the stuff good blog posts are made of, people. Stay tuned!

Don't Hate the Player

I have a secret, people. I need to share it with you.

I've got two boyfriends. Two. My life has been a juggling act lately.

One boyfriend lets me stay home in my pajamas, gives me lots of personal space, and doesn't make me wear shoes. He says "hey honey! I've got a great idea. Let's sit down and watch Maury for an hour, and try to guess who is the daddy." He's good like that. But he leaves me alone a lot, and I find that I'm an unhappy girl. Which is why I've sought out boyfriend #2.

Boyfriend #2 is a sophisticated man. He brings me flowers, likes me to dress up in pretty outfits, and holds the promise of free massages over my easily swayed head. He wears a suit, he takes me on nice dates, and he always pays for everything. He makes me feel loved.

When I'm with Boyfriend #1, I feel lonely. It wasn't always like that, we were happy for the first few years. Now, the personal space is great (I'm a very independent woman), but I find I'm dating myself most times. I'm not wowed by Boyfriend #1 anymore, even though we've been together for almost 5 years.

When I'm with Boyfriend #2, I feel excited, passionate, full of life. I feel useful, and happy, and vibrant. But Boyfriend #2 wants me to break up with #1. You see, he's not the polygamist type. And frankly, I'm not handling it well myself either. I hate sneaking around, I feel like I'm lying all the time, and I'm full of anxiety at what road to take.

Boyfriend #2 says he wants to marry me, but only if I leave #1.

So I've been waiting for about three weeks now for that proposal... nervous, anxious, anticipating. I'm terrified of change, but I've just been SO unhappy.

Who will I end up with?!

Inertia

It seems like EVERY person in my life is going through a major transitional period. They are either engaged, pregnant, just had a baby, just got married, are buying a house, or are switching jobs--starting exciting new careers.

I... am doing none of the above.

And I feel a little like I'm standing in the ocean, my feet cemented into a layer of wet sand, watching the world change around me while I stand still.

It's not that I want to trade lives with any of them, and I'm genuinely happy for each one for the blessings they have. It's just that it makes me realize that nothing in this world is ever going to stop changing, even for a second. Even when I think it will always be exactly like it is. Even when I HOPE it will.

It won't be. It can't.

And I suppose that's a good thing, because we can't just stay the same forever. We need to change, and grow... to evolve.

Some periods in your life are full of change, and others are a bit more stationary. I guess when you're in your late twenties, it's natural to look around, check out what everybody else is doing, and take inventory of your own life.

But I feel a bit overwhelmed by everything changing at once. Like I need to run and catch up with everybody else. (For what? To DO what? Is life a race?) I guess it's left me wondering what path I'm on, in life, in my career.

And how is it all going to turn out?