|The Carebears are ready to party!|
In the last year, there were tough times. For the first time in my life, I let go of people who were toxic in my life. I lost my uncle to cancer and had to put a kitty down. I faced death head-on, had to play God and choose it, and it made me realize that while it's a sad and devastating part of life, I'm not so afraid of it anymore. I'm stronger than I thought I was.
But there were more beautiful moments than there were sad ones, and out of tragedy there was inspiration, too. My sister got engaged, my brother got engaged, friends have have welcomed children into the world, and I got to see my family be put back together. I'm so incredibly blessed to have the life I do, to be surrounded with good friends, family and people who love me unconditionally.
In this last year, I think I've started to become more aware of my strengths and weaknesses, how I want to live my life and who I want to be surrounded by. I had to be incredibly honest with myself and recognize that I've been a pushover. I've let people walk all over me and I pointed fingers and played the victim. I didn't speak up when I should have, didn't tell people how I was truly feeling. And really, that makes me a liar. I've held this sarcastic outer shell as a defense to hide what I was really feeling, and I became damn good at it, too. My sarcasm makes me who I am, but I need to be open, sincere and honest, too. It only took me 27 years to realize that.
I have so many AMAZING things to look forward to this year of my life: my brother's wedding, being a part of my sister's wedding, welcoming a brother and a sister into my family, and seeing friends bring their own children into the world. And I get to do it all with the most incredible man by my side. And now that I'm finally starting to realize the way I want to live my life, I can't wait to see what the next year has in store :)